Find out who I am and STOP asking, 'What do you do?'

‘So Kelly, what do you do?’
I hate this question. Whenever I meet someone new and they ask me this, they’ll probably see a slight eye-roll, a sigh and a moment of silence. You see, I think it’s one of the worst questions you can ask someone and sometimes I’d like to reply with, ‘I poo, I eat, I watch T.V…’ and see their reaction.
When you tell somebody, ‘I’m a…’ the word filling the gap results on judgement. For example, over the years my answers have included:
Shop worker (this has been my job several times over the years..)
Pot washer
Trainee Midwife
Trainee Teacher
and now Writer/Blogger/Reviewer.
Here’s my beef… you say any one of these and someone on the receiving end paints their own picture of you. They put a puzzle together and mostly it’s incorrect. They presume so much about you and it sucks. I’ll tell you a story, it’s quite short but it should illustrate my point…
One day I went to a toddler group. I was in the first year of a midwifery course. A child fell and I helped them up, their mother came over and I said something like (I was a bit softer back then) ‘I helped, I hope that’s okay,’ and her reply was, ‘Of course, it’s fine… you’re a healthcare professional.’
WTF???? It’s okay I touched your child’s hand because I’m a healthcare professional?! What the hell would happen if I helped their child now?! She’d scream at me, ‘You’re only a blogger, get away from my child!!!!’
It was like the most insane moment of my ‘parenting journey’, when I realised people actually care what you ‘do’, that they choose whether you’re worthy to hang out with, or whether or not to continue talking to you, whether to allow you help their children when they fall…
It’s insane.
I don’t actually care if you stock shelves in Tesco, or sweep the streets, or you’re my G.P (in fact I believe I wouldn’t survive without any of these!), I will work out if we can be friends from getting to know you. Finding out if you like David Bowie, for example… or if you love zombies, that kinda thing… You could have a job doing ANYTHING but if you slated Tom Cruise, well we couldn’t hang out… Or could we?! That’s how you find out if you click, from finding out WHO somebody is, not what they DO.
So let’s stop pre-judging people based on their job, let’s stop asking this question, ‘What do you do?’, instead let’s ask, ‘What’s your favourite colour? What’s you favourite song? Do you like thunderstorms or rainbows?’ Let’s shake life up and stop being so narrow-minded, boring and square!
Let’s find out who people are, not what they do.



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